Forget about watching your weekly dose of seduction videos if you haven’t first worked on finding a wingman for the weekend. It’s normally easy in western countries. However, in a large part of the third world, it can be hell to find someone as committed as you are, who is also into seduction. In this situation, you have no choice but to up your game, and you have to improve how you market yourself to other guys. Be the most alluring friend that you can be.
This includes dressing well and being well-groomed e.g. facial and neck hair trimmed. Thus not having an “embarrassing” and repulsive physical appearance. Furthermore, take the leadership role in your community. Start your own seduction lair. Organize meetups to go meet women together. Participate in a team sport, fitness activities, or hiking. Or go take tinder photos with other guys in your area to build friendships.
Contents
Befriend a Newbie
To find a wingman, one option is to befriend someone new to seduction. This can work sometimes, but it takes a lot of hard work to help the new guy improve his level of game up to a decent standard. Sometimes eventually the newbie loses interest in game, then all your effort was wasted. Thus, there’s got to be side-benefits to you such as social companionship, from the beginning.
Other times, the wing can use you for your knowledge and dump you when he learned everything he could from you. These type of wings you must identify early on, and not invest more than the wing does in the relationship.
Moreover, meet and keep on gaming with new potential wingmen so that you’ll eventually have a wide circle of friends. Then you won’t become too invested in one wingman, who you need to perpetually mentor. Or who may eventually run off after he learned everything he could from you.
Seek the Good
Another option is winging with someone better than you. These wings are harder to find. Especially if your game is at an intermediate to advanced level. In the seduction scene, there are a lot of newbies. While the top-end is only sparsely populated with good PUA’s. Plus, the most experienced guys often quit game to start a family with one (or two) girlfriend(s).
In any case, when approaching the best wingmen, make sure you know what you can bring from your side. For example, a good friendly vibe, willingness to engage the cock-blocks, willingness to learn, passion for seduction, helping out your wing with his daily life, or maybe shooting some infield for him to help improve his game. I’m sure some guys would probably smuggle drugs for the privilege of gaming with the best wings – this is a bad idea. Know the limits.
While traveling, I’ve had the privilege of gaming with “natural” guys who know nothing about the seduction industry. Yet they were still socially gifted. Thus look beyond game if necessary to find good wings.
Lastly, if the wing is at your level, then that’s good, you both win by winging together.
Wingmen who become Pivots
To meet wingmen, go on the internet forums, and the social media groups. Suggest meeting up for gaming. These wings can eventually introduce you to other wings. Sometimes you have more in common with the new wing you get introduced to, and he becomes a better friend than the “pivot” – the wing who connected you with the other guy.
Moreover, another option is to go out with guys you meet in your day-to-day. They don’t do game, but they are social. The club itself is also a great place to meet male friends and wingmen. They are there at the same time and place as you, and they could also be single. Nothing is stopping you from winging with anybody you randomly stumble into in a nightclub.
Have the Right Mindset
Giving value attracts wingmen, saying what you’re thinking attracts wingmen. Simply by discussing your last night out by writing a field report or a fail report, can attract wingmen. But sulking about the lack of wingmen in your life will not attract wingmen. Simply have the mindset to reach out to other PUA’s and it’ll bear fruit. Some guys will have bad attitudes (whether for good or bad reason), but you have to move past them to get to the wings who have good attitudes.
Like with women, meeting wingmen that you get along with well, is a numbers game. Thus be open to being “rejected” by the wrong type of guys, to find more positive wingmen to party with.
Lastly remember: A wingman must not be a crutch. Instead, it should be a bonus. Be happy or content with yourself first, and you’ll also have a happy wingman. Don’t try to meet wings to fill the void in your own game. Fix your mindset first, then you’ll attract wingmen automatically. Keep your inner game strong: Don’t tell yourself you are bad with winging, or bad in meeting new wingmen. Instead, affirm what a quality wingman you already are. And what awesome social skills you already have.
Technology and Wingmen
In the past, social interaction was an offline thing. There used to be only landline phones. And before that only a postal system. Nowadays, we text, email, and use cell phones. Thus to have an abundance of wingmen, we can’t shun technology. You can use social media to portray yourself as an attractive wingman to other guys. A guy who is social has photos with friends on his profile, and not only selfies.
It’s also helpful for dating apps like Tinder, if you have friends in common with your matches on social media. It’s a form of online social proof. Your wing is a common friend, thus you’re less likely to be a creep or stalker.
Apps to find Wingmen
Couchsurfing Hangouts: 8/10
(I actually have a field report where I partied with a Hangouts wing.)
Meetup.com: 7/10
(E.g. Social Activity Meetups. Hiking Meetups.)
Facebook Pickup and Seduction groups: 8/10
(These groups have become more rare in 2023.)
Active Internet Seduction Forums: 8.5/10
(There aren’t that many active forums left. But good luck finding one or two.)
Telegram Communities: 7.5/10
(Meeting wings on Telegram is a fairly new concept, as its a newer app. A problem with Telegram is that it’s filled with anonymous users. They’re on telegram to benefit from the strict privacy settings. This means they’re less likely to meet up than e.g. dating forum or facebook group members. On occasion, there’s some guys with real profile photos of themselves. These dudes are usually more sincere, and worth meeting.)
Bad idea to meet wings: Swiping men on Dating apps like Tinder to find male friends or wingmen – The guys swiping other guys are gay (although they won’t admit it). Dating apps are definitely not the place to find wingmen: -5 / 10
Unusual Wingmen Solutions
Wing-girl
Sometimes a girl will insist that she only wants to be friends. She may or may not have a boyfriend. But the bottom line is, she doesn’t want to have sex with you. However, you can still e.g. go to organic markets together. Thus, now see her as your wing-girl.
She’ll offer you social value and companionship, while you accumulate phone numbers 😉 I’ve done this very successfully, but don’t brag to your wing-girl about the numbers you’re getting. Also give her good companionship, e.g. be genuinely interested in what she’s buying. In this way, you can keep her around for the future without irritating her by only showing her your seducer side. You have to calibrate to the girl, e.g. some girls would want you to almost pretend you are gay, while stealthily you go around getting phone numbers. Dunno if this is really worth your time. While other girls will be O.K. with you hitting on chicks while you’re out, to make it equally as much fun to you as for her. This is better.
Of course, finding wing-girls in the nightclub is something you should also do. Every girl who turns you down sexually, is still a potential wing-girl.
Dog Wingman
In the day you don’t really need a wingman, but take a dog for a walk, any dog, and meet girls while you’re out and about.
Peacocking
If you’re sarging alone, wear an interesting piece of clothing or jewelry, to bring some unusual value to the club or bar. Then befriend everyone who’ll ask you about this thing your wearing. This is 100% old-school pickup, but worth a try if you’re planning to game alone. Naughty Nomad is one of the pioneers of modern peacocking. Read my review of his latest book, where he extensively mentions peacocking: My Life as an Mexican Pirate.
Paid Wingman
This is the PUA and Seduction industry. You pay a coach, and he accompanies you to a nightclub or in the day. He then teaches tips and tricks of the trade, in exchange for money. Moreover, he offers social value and motivates you to take action and approach the girls you are attracted to. These guys usually paid a lot of money for their own mentorships. Thus, it’s a fair exchange to ask money in return for coaching. At Nice Guy Seduction, we offer the same service. Here’s the Skype coaching link. I’ll add an onsite bootcamp coaching page later.
Conclusion
If you’re a computer game addict (or stay indoors most of the time), rather do activities outside that are beneficial towards making you more attractive to women. Have an exciting life. If your life sucks, then fake having an exciting life until your life improves. If you are in a country without a seduction scene, then you have to put in the extra effort to make male friends.
Don’t stagnate in the same place, move if you have to. Don’t curse your situation, or where you live. It’ll keep you stuck. Find the excitement and passion by trying new things and not being like a tree with so deep roots, but that’s rooted in the desert.
Value the good in the existing wings around you. That’s your starting point. Nothing can help your game like supportive, well-intentioned wingmen.
Also read Wingmen Part 1: Ten great benefits of wingmen.
What’s your suggestion to meet fun wings to party with? Comment below your own experience, tips and questions. If you’ve got your own wing-group, forum, etc, also comment below. Or link to my blog, and I’ll include you in this article.
